Unraveling the concept of 'likeability' in the workplace can be a complex task. It's more than just being popular or friendly. It's about leadership, empathy, and the ability to inspire others. Let's delve into the true essence of workplace likeability.
The urge to be liked is a powerful force in this world
It can force you to rethink behavior, appearances, and relationships
- But despite even the best efforts, no one has a say in how much other people like them.
- Alicia Menendez explains how likeability is a moving target- an invisible scorecard that we internalize but that those around us fill out for us.
What concrete steps can we take to combat these traps at work?
Push for more subjective, concrete feedback
- Know when it’s time to leave
- Find your people
- If you want to have a high-functioning, results-oriented workplace, then you need to make sure that you are prioritizing building a workplace where people feel like they can show up as themselves
Likeability can be used as a catchall for other biases
A Black woman who shows up as assertive will often be read as aggressive or angry
- For Latinas like myself, there are two different stereotypes we run into: either this idea that we are really humble and hard workers, but not necessarily leadership material, or we are vivacious and passionate like Sofía Vergara in Modern Family.
Women often get stuck in the “Goldilocks conundrum”
Too warm, too cold
- As a woman, you will either get feedback that you are too warm, or too strong
- We are living in a moment where there is a premium placed on authenticity and authentic leadership
- However, if you are telling women that however they show up is not the right way to show up as a likeable leader, then they cannot possibly show up authentically as themselves
